Understanding Boys

Boys think differently to girls. Boys are physiologically different to girls. Boys develop differently to girls. These are fundamental facts.

Young boy and teddy bear

As a mum to one boy and two girls, I can see these differences. I love all three of my children the same, but I am aware I have much less understanding of where my son is coming from than I do my girls.

Recently we have been having a few issues with my son and I have no idea how to solve them. What do you do when you struggle with a parenting issue? You turn to books for advice.

I like to read parenting books with a bit of a pinch of salt. I don’t want to be told ‘you should do this’ or ‘you must do that’. Often you can read them and come away thinking you are a total failure, done everything wrong and you’ve completely screwed up your children.

I believe, there is no right or wrong, all children are different, all parents and families are different, so I like to draw on the psychology behind the advice, as well as a few things I could try.

This week I downloaded the audiobook of ‘Raising boys’ by Steve Biddulph. I am a slow reader so thought I would get through this much quicker with an audio version. It is a fascinating book which discusses the differences between boys and girls. It talks about the biological and hormonal differences as well as the psychology behind them.

I loved it, as it didn’t make me feel a failure, it just gave me insight into a boys world and suggestions on how to embrace their personality and how I can help them in their future development. Hubby is also now listening to it, so we can work together.

I would highly recommend this book to anyone who has boys. As a female bringing up a boy, it can be difficult understanding how he feels, how he thinks.

The testosterone in his body makes him feel different, want to be more active and competitive. I need to learn how to embrace and nurture these traits in my son rather than quash them.

I am already feeling better about things, when you understand why a behaviour is happening, I think you are halfway there to either solving it or coming to terms with that’s just how it is and there is actually nothing wrong with it.

I am now on a big learning curve trying to understand my boy and nurture his differences.

See Also

A Poem to My Son

Parenting Three Children

7 thoughts on “Understanding Boys”

  1. I grew with two little brothers so I had a little understanding of how they work! But yes, boys are very different to raise than girls. Thank you for the book recommendation, may look for it 🙂

  2. That sounds like a great book and very useful for mums of boys. I’d never really thought about the potential difficulties in understanding when trying to raise a child of the opposite gender – glad that you’ve found something that helps you understand your son a little more.

  3. Sounds like a really good book. Does it start with toddlerhood or is it aimed at older boys than that? They’re definitely different, and I know I understand my daughter better than my son, so I’m sure to get this at some point, thanks for the recommendation x

  4. Thanks for the recommendation. I might check that out. As a mother to a boy I often worry that I don’t understand his needs as well as I perhaps would a daughter 🙂

  5. I have a son and we are okay now. But I know eventually there would be things that I wont understand and would be hard for him to express. I think I am going to check this book out.

  6. I have very much the same philosophy as you on parenting, all kids are different, as are all.parents and we have to find ways that work for us and our kids. Glad to hear this has helped you understand boys a bit more, something I will bear in mind for the future!

  7. The book sounds very interesting. I too have found a difference in how I raise my children according to gender, what surprised me is how much more emotional and affectionate my boys are than their sisters. They are a lot more sensitive than I thought boys would be x

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