True friends are hard to come by. When you move house and relocate, it can be difficult to leave friends behind and build new ones. This is just what happened to me, so I thought I’d share my own friends story too.
When we got married in Dec 2006, we relocated and didn’t know anybody in the area. A couple of months later saw those terrible 2007 floods and yes, that was us. Our new home flooded, I was 7 weeks pregnant, in a location I knew no one.
I started a new job a few weeks later (they didn’t even know I was pregnant) and life was incredibly difficult. We lived in a caravan on the drive, with no heating through winter, throughout my first pregnancy and first year of marriage. I think that was the most challenging year of my life!
Throughout that time, we had no friends in this location, so when we had the opportunity to attend NCT classes, we jumped at the chance. It was fantastic, we met lots of people, which gave us a chance to make new friends.
There were eight couples and all due around a similar time. If anyone finds themselves in a similar situation, wanting to make new friends during your pregnancy, I would highly recommend NCT classes.
Following these classes, all the mums-to-be arranged to meet for coffee in our local bookshop/coffee shop the following week. This was the beginning of some wonderful friendships. From then on, we all met weekly in this coffee shop, on the sofas, first of all with bumps, then gradually each of us returned minus the bump, but with our beautiful new additions. Our little group grew.
I loved these coffee mornings. I had wonderful new friends to share our baby moments and to talk about our new parenting adventures with. We chatted about anything and everything, from all those cute little baby moments, to labour, birth and sleepless nights. We laughed a lot, supported each other and I think there were a few tears shed too. That’s what friends are for.
As the weeks went on, we enjoyed more and more coffee moments together, cementing some great friendships, until eventually the time came when we had to admit defeat, the babies wanted to be crawling around, not sat on our laps or in the buggy, so we started meeting at each others houses where the children could play. This continued until the children started pre-school and the group unfortunately shrank a little.
Then came the second round of babies, and third in my case. We all got to meet up again, until people started returning to work etc.
However, I still meet with two friends every week after school and we also meet as a group of seven of us every so often for a girls night out. Those coffee mornings were one of the best things that happened to me.
It gave me the opportunity to share moments and make long lasting friendships, which is so important, especially in those early days of parenthood.
This is very true and as a girl whose grown into a woman and moved SO much that ‘true friends’ are sort of scattered each way and that.
And even though I cannot get to them for coffee mornings, I have the power of social media to stay in touch!
I think NCT/antenatal classes are such a fab place to meet new people, and you know that they will be going through the same things at the same time.
It’s so lovely to have someone with children of a similar age to talk too. I met one of my best friends at a postnatal group run by my doctor’s surgery.
I never took NCT classes (so wish I had!) but almost everyone I know who has done them has made great friends there. I think it helps that you’re all at the same stage of life and have an obvious topic to talk about.
So good that you were able to make friends like this. I never did NCT myself. I know it’s been very valuable for so many people, but I was living in my home town with all my family and old friends around me, so it didn’t seem important to me.
I wouldn’t be without my three besties. Like you, we’ve laughed, cried, shouted and drunk together. They’re the nearest I will ever get to sisters and consider my self so lucky to have the three of them xx
What a really great post lovely. I have found it hard to be friends with people because of my controlling ex and I still find it hard now.
I am scared of hurting and upsetting people and also of trusting them not to do it to me.
Relocating hasn’t really helped me either. So pleased that you have such a great group.
Very true – true friends are those you can call five years down the line and pick up where you left off. I have two of those – priceless.